Retireed Joke

This is a joke told by Denis Walter during a concert in our Village.



It is about a recently retired entertainer called Ernie …

… who was looking forward to taking it easy in his retirement.


Like many retirees he found that his wife, Glenys, had some jobs for him to do.

The first one was to fix the wobbly front steps …

… Ernie pointed to his forehead and replied, “Have I got Bunnings written here?”

The second was to fix the fridge door that was hanging off … “Have I got Kelvinator , on my forehead?”


The third was to repair the hot water service which was only producing cold water … “Do I look line i've got Braemar on my forehead?”


After these exchanges Ernie stormed out of the house to the pub, taking his wallet with all of their money.

Much later he returned home to find the steps fixed, the fridge door no longer hanging off and the water service producing hot water.

When he asked Glenys how the repairs had been done she replied:

“Soon after you left, with all of our money, a bronzed young man came to the door asking if I had any odd jobs for him to do. When he had completed them I told him that I did not have any money so how would he like to be paid. He gave two options, bake a cake or go the bed and have sex.”

“What type of cake did you make him”, asked Ernie.

“Do I have Sara Lee on my forehead”, was her reply.